How to Talk to the Dead

Reviewed by Stina Garbis

Last Updated: April 25, 2024 Fact Checked

Do you long to talk to a loved one who has passed away, or learn more about an ancient ancestor? Perhaps you're hoping to reason with a spirit who seems to be haunting your home. People have been talking to the dead for thousands of years using a variety of different methods. Read on to learn how to communicate with unseen spirits on your own or with the help of an outside source.

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Speaking Directly to the Dead

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1
Shift your focus to sharpen your sixth sense. If simply focusing on the image of your dead loved one is not enough form of connection, you could try a more structured method of shifting your focus to a higher realm.
- Make yourself consciously aware of what it feels like to be yourself in the present moment. Note your location, the time, and your feelings. Otherwise, it may make it difficult to return to your sense afterward.
- Gradually bring your senses into "soft focus," or a state of being in which you are less aware of the physical details around you.
- Once your physical awareness goes down, focus on the energy surrounding you in the room. Do not look for it, but merely make yourself open to forces present in the room other than yourself. If you feel any presences, try asking questions. Be aware that any answers you do receive may not come as words, but as images or emotions.
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Attempt to talk through the power of your mind.^{[1]
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Research source} Some paranormal experts believe that the ability to talk to the dead is not limited to professional mediums, but that the capability lies within anyone who can heighten his or her spiritual awareness. It may take time and practice before you can connect to a dead loved one, but it is possible according to this theory.
- Quiet yourself and clear your mind as though you are preparing to meditate. Sit in a location that is silent and free from distraction. Close your eyes and empty your mind of anxiety and thought.
- Fix an image of your deceased loved one in your mind after you have cleared your mind of any other thoughts. Choose an image that is representative of that loved one according to the relationship you had with him or her. The more significant the image is to you, the easier it will be to establish a connection.
- Ask your deceased loved one a question after you have held that person's image in your mind for several seconds. Keep your mind focused on that image and wait. Do not answer how you believe that person would answer. Instead, be patient until you receive a reply that you can be certain did not come from your own mind.
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Ask for a response to simple questions. This technique is not as useful for contacting dead loved ones, but it is a common practice used by paranormal investigators who are attempting to talk with spirits at a location that is haunted or potentially haunted. Go to a room in which the most paranormal activity takes place. Ask basic yes-or-no questions, and request a specific method of answering. The most common two methods of reply are knocking and flashlights.
- For knocking, instruct any spirits in the room to give one knock for yes or two for no.
- If using a flashlight, go with a flashlight that can be turned on easily, like one with a button on the end. Turn it on and unscrew the front section until the flashlight just barely goes off. Set it down on a flat surface and position it so that it cannot roll away on its own. Gently push on the power button and make sure that the light can flicker on and off. Instruct any spirits in the room to tap on the button once for yes or twice for no.

Part 2

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Enlisting Outside Help

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Work with a medium. Mediums are well versed in connecting with spirits of the dead. You can usually contact a medium by searching for one online or in a phone book. If you want to speak to a dead loved one, the medium may ask to meet at your home or may have you come to his or her place of work.
- If you want a medium to speak to a spirit you believe to be in your home, the medium will need to come to your home. Not every medium will perform the latter service, but most will provide the former.
- Be wary about the medium you choose to go to. Even those who are not skeptical about the practice of speaking to the dead will usually be willing to acknowledge that not every medium is legitimate. As with anything else, there are scam artists out there. Research a medium before scheduling an appointment with him or her and try to verify that he or she is the real deal. When you meet for your appointment, take note of whether or not the medium is leading you on with questions and having you provide the answers they claim to be offering.
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Look into EVP and EMP technologies.^{[2]
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Research source} An EVP, or Electronic Voice Phenomena, occurs when a voice that is not audible to the naked human ear gets recorded on a digital recording. A EMP, or Electromagnetic Pulse, can only be registered using an EMP meter. To attempt either option, you should go to a room that is known to have high spiritual energy and ask questions there.
- When looking for EVP, you can ask just about any question. This is the practice most commonly used when trying to find out a spirit's name or other unknown details. Ask your questions, providing a lengthy pause in between each so that any spirits there have time to answer. Replay the recording and listen carefully for any murmurs or unusual sounds that could translate into answers.
- An EMP is usually limited to yes-or-no questions. The most commonly used EMP meter is a light-up device, which lights up when electromagnetic energy gets high. Ask your questions and instruct any spirits in the room that lighting up the meter once equals a yes, while lighting it up twice equals a no.
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Conduct a séance. A séance is a gathering of people who communicate with the dead using their collective energy.^{[3]
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Research source} To perform one, you will need at least three people who are open to the experience. This practice can be used to talk to dead loved ones or wandering spirits. Be warned, however, that you do run a notable risk of contacting a malicious spirit.
- Set the mood by dimming the lights and lighting candles. Use three candles, or a number of candles divisible by three. You may even light incense.
- Have the participants hold candles around a table to create a circle. Perform a chant to call out to the spirits.
- Alternatively, you may also attempt to call the spirits using a Ouija board.^{[4]
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  Research source}
- Wait for a response, repeating your chant as necessary.
- Once you make a connection, calmly ask your questions.
- Break the séance by breaking the circle and putting the candles out.

Part 3

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Using Prayer and Other Practices

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Say prayers. Not every faith has a practice you can use for praying to or for the dead, but some do. These prayers are often intercessory in nature and take two forms.
- In the first, you are praying for the deceased loved one to find rest and joy in the afterlife, rather than to them specifically, but it might be with the knowledge that your dead loved one is listening or aware of your prayers.
- In the second, you are praying to the deceased loved one. You are not asking for salvation from the spirit, but you are asking your loved one to intercede or pray for you from the other side. Some believe that, as a part of the spiritual realm, the spirit of someone who had strong faith in life will be able to make a more ardent plea or prayer for you to a deity from the other side.
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Look into mirror gazing. Mirror gazing is a practice some use in an effort to talk to dead loved ones. It is similar to trying to connect to the spirit using your mind, but in this practice, you use a mirror to help establish the connection more clearly.
- Quiet your thoughts. Go to a silent room where you can be alone and stand in front of a mirror. Close your eyes and rid yourself of anxiety, intense emotion, or unrelated thought.
- Focus your thoughts on the person you want to speak with. Create an image of that person in your mind. Make the image as clear as possible until you can practically see their features.
- Open your eyes slowly and look into the mirror. Imagine that the image in your mind will appear in the mirror. Even if the image is blurry or overlaps with your own, you should be able to see the image of your deceased loved one in the mirror.
- Ask your questions. Do not force answers, but be open to them. Also be aware of the fact that the answers may come as emotions or images rather than words.
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Communicate with the deceased through a possession. Some have found that objects owned by a deceased person are still connected to that person's spirit. Possessions can give you the power to call that person's spirit to you and make it possible to communicate. If you wish to talk with a loved one who has passed away, seek out an item of clothing, a book, or some other personal object that the person used. Take it to the place where the person lived or stayed. Hold the object and initiate a conversation.
If you are hesitant or skeptical about talking to dead loved ones using paranormal or supernatural means, you can always talk to the dead without asking for an answer in return.^{[5]
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Research source} For those who believe in the existence of spirits, it is also a common belief that those spirits may watch over living loved ones. You can talk to a deceased loved one anywhere, or you could choose a location that has special meaning, such as a grave or a place where you shared a memorable experience. Tell the person whatever is on your mind. You can ask questions, but since you are not looking for answers, you do not necessarily need to limit yourself to questions.

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My grandmother passed months ago. I was very rude to her when she was alive. I really cry every day for the cruel actions I did. I just want to tell her sorry for whatever I've done. Is there a way?

Isabella Ambrose

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Try the steps above. You can tell her that you deeply regret this and that you are sorry. Tell her you really love her and didn't really mean all of the things you said. Then, if you want to go the extra mile, ask if there is anything you can do to make her happy.

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I want to speak to my grandfather and I want to ask him some questions - like does he watch over me or not, what he thinks I should do, etc. Do these techniques for talking to the dead really work?

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Most of the time, you can answer some of these questions on your own. If he ever shows up in your dreams, it might be that he is watching over you, or trying to tell you something. It's most important to work out what to do for yourself though, it's what your grandfather would expect of a living human being.

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What does it mean when my grandmother, who died 17 days ago, appears in my dreams?

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It means that your memory is keeping her alive as you remember her. Enjoy the memory, it's special.

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Tips

Talk to the dead in your sleep. Ask your question to the deceased before going to bed. If your desire to have them answer your question is strong, they might come in your dreams and give you the answers you seek. This might not work every time though.

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You must be extremely cautious when trying to contact the dead, especially when grieving because you are vulnerable for bad spirits to attach to you. There are bad or evil spirits, if you even remotely believe in talking to the dead, believe this. They can posses you in a way, in my opinion for a short time, and you will not even be aware of it. Believe this...be careful and do not be behind the wheel or have a firearm in hand shortly after just to be safe!

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Balance skepticism with open-mindedness. In order for any of these practices to work, you will need to be open-minded about the experience. At the same time, it is easy to get carried away and to fabricate responses if you are desperate for the practice to work.

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Warnings

Exercise extreme caution if you decide to attempt talking to the dead. In any method that requires you to “call” upon a spirit, you run the risk of calling upon something evil and dangerous. Many people who believe in the ability to talk to the dead also believe that evil spirits can attach themselves to a person, haunting and even possessing them.

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